Wednesday, December 07, 2022

4110 : Us and them

(Excerpted from another longer fictional piece, from within my repository)

You sat at the edge of the white table. Looking at you, I noticed your wrinkles and dark circles. The thinning hair too. The imperfect you. You hated me, Spin, for saying that.

Clutching onto my coffee cup, with my sweaty nervous hands, I reminisced. We had steadily grown apart. Grown older. All but an arm's length separated us, and yet, I just could not get myself to kiss your hand. A simple kiss - not out of romance, or love, but out of the oomph of everyday tenderness. Like I once would, without a thought, without a reason. A gentle kiss, to tell you that I want to walk with you in your shoes. Allow me, Spin.

We go by names. You go by names. You were and always will be Spin for me. Why do I say that now? I loved the Spin of you. My interests in physics made me romance the idea that we were two discrete particles with connected Spins.

Your aging always bothered you. You thought others would stop loving you as you aged. You believed I had weaned away due to your age and grime. Let me sing to you, Spin - I never stopped loving you in these long years. I saw you for your 1000 parts and grew attached to each of those 1000 parts. Inch by inch, like Saleem Sinai's grandfather (inside jokes hated that too!!)

I am very sure of that. I mean, of my unflinching love for you. That day, I had driven a good 4 hrs just to get some basic time with you. I would have happily driven 12 hours for the same few minutes. 

Dont you see it Spin - I dont hope for a better future. I dont even hope for happier times.

I must admit though, I have never felt comfortable with the space between. The chasm. You never understood coffees, but "us" sings to me as much as the twirl of this light roast. I have always fervently wanted "us". 

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