Sunday, February 28, 2021

3108 : Art, the artist and the failing

 For years I have staunchly maintained that there are certain values for which I shall "cancel" an artist or a friend or someone I know.

A good example is "Pablo Neruda" whose poems I like, but I don't read, because he glorified and almost romanticized "rape". (Google on that).

Recently I have also had similar strong views on a few right-wing celebrities who have endorsed violence (implicitly).

And in this "canceling" I have been strict and have exercised this with moral indignation that I usually otherwise don't have.

And then today I was having a chat with someone and she convinced me with a few compelling arguments, that I am being an "asshole" (not the poriborton types :-)).

What I liked is the beauty and elegance with which the arguments were made. I learned a lot. I might still cancel Pablo Neruda, but now I know why I might be an "asshole" too.

The part of the argument which I liked the most - was don't let a failing - negate the net output in some other stream.

A few years ago I failed too. And I had a free fall from my own pedestal.

And I know I hurt from the "cancel" which was called upon me. And that's the memory that this talk triggered in me. It was an aha moment.

That's the post.

3107 : Lonely by Agha Shahid Ali

 From my fav poet (via their twitter handle)

they left him alive so that he could be lonely- The god of small things is not consoled in real time!

3106 : The long and math of it

 I have been reading a lot of math, and I am horribly weak at it. I mean not basics, but advanced math required for physics and AI.

And I feel very incomplete about it.

Working to get to a better place, but might be years before that.

This time though I won't give up :-)

Saturday, February 27, 2021

3105 : My new content poison is podcasts

Love the format.

Love the conversation. 

Love the long lazy podcasts. 

I struggle to now find time to hear podcasts because I am usually working all the time. And I cannot work and listen to podcasts at the same time.

Need to hack that habit in :-)

Coming soon a list of podcasts I love. 

3104 : This blog 2

On the other hand, I do get some fab comments and conversations with friends based on posts here.

And those are most welcome. 

Open to a debate. Always. Always :-).

And if you can help me bend my framework, even better. 

Bring it on. 

There is no meaning in this life - without knowing the "meaning" itself....and possibly sometimes to find the "right question".

We all know the answer, its "42", now lets find the right question to ask.

Bring the conversation on.

3103 : This blog

Ha ha :-)

This blog has given me more than my share of conflict and judgments. (I mean passed upon me).

I get beaten by folks who read this :-)

Don't misunderstand me. This blog is me. But its a sliver of me. And this blog is/was never meant to cast judgments on others. At best I sometimes have some wicked/evil humor.....but I dont think I have ever launched a mean-spirited attack on anyone/anything....including anything political.

And yet the grief I get on various items on this blog is almost funny.

And it's not trolling, because that would be funny.

This is serious philosophical mindfk :-(

This blog is nothing more than a journal to one day show my daughter - how broken (and possibly human) her dad was. 

This is a blog with an intended audience of "1" and that's her.


3102 : Have been struggling

With a lot of work and possibly a slightly broken spirit.

One goal is to come back and write (often).


Sunday, February 21, 2021

3101 : My mood today is...

 Ranjish hi sahi, dil hi dukhane ke liye aa...

Sunday, February 14, 2021

3099 : A cup of tea

A cup of tea. Pause. Deep reflection. What I see is the blurred grey.

3098 : The drill

For the past 2 weeks, or so, all I have done is woken up....gone for a walk....and then worked till late night.

Eat. Sleep. Rinse. Repeat.

While its easy to rationalize this, as a blip, its harder when you know  - you are working on solving difficult problems.

It takes a toll.

I have missed tons of emails, calls, smses.....which is all long as this counts.

That's the post.

Sunday, February 07, 2021

3097 : Bad...

I was at the gym yesterday and it has fab acoustics.

And the DJ (who comes on some days) knows me well. So to surprise me (pleasantly) he decided to play some retro music. 

And one of the songs he played was "Bad" by Michael Jackson.

And I was torn....completely. Its the first English Pop song that I ever heard. So it has a special place. And I love that song.

But I was torn....due to "Finding Neverland" and what it means for the artist. I don't feel comfortable supporting artists - who have committed grave crimes.

My moral compass is limited and I have very few rules.....but I try and hold them sacrosanct.

And MJ broke at least one of them, if not more.

Torn....unable to distinguish between the art and the artist.

3096 : Once again....

I am struggling to write.

Too many thoughts, too many fears, too much work, and just plain distracted.

I intend to start with a series around long essays or have been meaning to for some time.

But am very far from that yet.

Losing steam, a day at a time.

Friday, February 05, 2021

3095 : Always liked Michael Brook the musician

Especially because of his collab with NFAK (Ustad Nusrat).

Have been listening to the rest of his work on Spotify and the contemplative music is all I need for times like today.

The stereo recordings are of fab quality. You can feel the music travel across the room.

(Or is it my fancy ear buds.....)

3094 : God on Trial

 “At the trial of God, we will ask: why did you allow all this?

And the answer will be an echo: why did you allow all this?”

— Ilya Kaminsky, Deaf Republic

(found via a twitter/medium blogpost)