Sunday, November 14, 2010

1329 : The hand that rocked the cradle

Shri and I have been discussing how to bring up children. I don’t quite believe in that stupid adage “there is no one right way”, which is almost used as a catch all to justify any of our practices.

With that view in my heart, having been scourging, hunting, sifting through lots of people’s brains for their ideas, books and the wealth of advice that the universe has to offer….all the time choosing carefully, what fits in and appeals to my rationale side and what appears humbug.

Shri and a few others believe there is no merit in necessarily seeking out either an ideal child rearing technique, or even to”target” an end state for the child.

Infact, Shri has written this really well.

There is nothing in that post that I can even remotely disagree, but yet…..

Where I struggle (and debate endlessly within myself) is my own experiences as an adult – seem to suggest that even an iota of focus can make one clearly stand out amongst the lumpen. You could use this focus to lead Naxalbari or become Einstien. Focus is not always routed to things which make you popular, it could make you infamous.

Leading from there…focus seems to be a necessary stepping stone to personal greatness….then why would you not help a little kid get some of that potion.

And the other aspect being discussed is “can you learn by reading”? or something to that effect.

Look….I am what I am.I have read 500 page tomes on Tao, that which essentially cannot and should not be described. If I can read that in hope of learning something, I assume I can read anything. I usually look at my readings as 99.95%pass through. You retain one idea out of a 400 page book, but sometimes that single idea can change the way you look at life.

I can give many examples of that….even in the current context. Like for example, the huge and undeniable role of “insecurity” in the brain development of a kid and an adult too. I could not have figured that insight on my own, unless I had brought up a score of kids already – but now that tiny bit of knowledge lies in my firmament because someone explained it to me in a way that appealed to m rational side…..

Having said that, I really think there is very little I can disagree with on Shri’s post. Meanwhile, I will continue my reading Smile, because I am what I am….

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