Monday, October 20, 2008

Post 430 : Learning my swansong - 4 (Rag Darbari Kanhara)

I can now play 2 ragas on the harmonium.

- Bageshri
- Darbari Kanhara

Now comes the unusual bit. I can't recite the notes by rote, but I can play them at one go. It is almost as if, my muscle memory is driving the music. That does not seem very right. So I definitely want to make sure I can verbally roll out the notes if needed.

Also, almost 2.5 months into this, I am still not sure where all of this is leading to. What keeps me going is faith. I tell myself, when we learnt our first syllables, had we questioned the "end", then we might have never gotten to reading, writing and posting on this blog. So some years of random learning (as I call it, figuring out the butt of the elephant) will be needed before I can hope to chart my own course.

The other thing which sometimes pulls me back, is when I realise, how far away I am from someone who can listen, sing and compose music. I feel a tinge of envy and "smallness", the when-will-I-ever-get-there-if-I-ever-do feeling.

I hope to give this endeavour about 3 years before I pull the plug. Till then, going to enjoy the  raag-paati.

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